The Female Assumption named Best Book of 2014; Global Media Awards hosted by The Population Institute

I am honored that my 1st book, The Female Assumption, will be awarded Best Book of 2014 in the Global Media Awards hosted by The Population Institute in Washington DC next month. The Population Institute was founded in 1969 by a Methodist minister whose mission was to educate legislatures about reproductive health and to work to prevent teen pregnancies. My book amplifies the discussion of motherhood as a choice rather than a foregone conclusion, and the need to contemplate the long journey that consumes lots of the "Big 3" (time, energy, financial resources). 

The Earth's resources are finite, and it's prudent for each generation to look into the future to examine what today's decisions mean for the future. 

Women opt in or out of motherhood for various reasons; they make decisions about how many children to have (if any)--none of these decisions are fodder for dinner party conversation.  These are excursions into bedroom territory. Treading into the personal lives of women is what society tends to do (just ask Jennifer Aniston).  I, for one, don't condone this.  I have friends, coworkers, nieces, and a daughter, and I support their right to choose the path that feels authentic.  Love, meaning, family, fulfillment--these are subjective terms. To believe otherwise is ethnocentric--not everyone wants the same thing. 

Our words matter; use them to protect and support, rather than judge.  

Peace.

Link to The Population Institute's announcement of 35th Annual Global Media Awards http://www.populationinstitute.org/newsroom/news/view/65/

Follow me on Facebook, where I post daily musings and links to the many articles/essays I publish, including a recent one in Psychology Today.

Meet the Author/Book Discussion--Sat. Nov. 1st, 3pm

My book, The Female Assumption: A Mother's Story, Freeing Women From the View That Motherhood is a Mandate, will be published in the next few weeks. It will be available via Amazon by mid-October.  It will take a little longer to work its way into other distribution channels (B&N, B&T, etc.).  Space is limited for this Book Discussion; please register in advance by emailing HolmesRSVPS at yahoo dot com. (Experienced bloggers spell out email addresses in order to protect from spam-bots). The location will be Alsip, IL.  When you Email me, I'll give you further details.

I've interviewed/polled 200 women (U.S. & international), those with & without children, and heard a high level of assumptions that motherhood is the ultimate expression of womanhood, that the truest form of love is between mother & child, and motherhood is "the one" experience that brings meaning to a woman's life.  Motherhood is a fulfilling path--and there are many more.  Love, family, meaning, happiness--these are subjective terms.  No one means for a woman to feel pain or confusion; no one wants a woman to turn away from family or friends who prod them with questions--but it happens.  Some women never wanted motherhood; some assumed they'd experience it and didn't; many are at peace with their lives...but many are not...because of things they hear from those closest to them.  It's time to update the scripts we use with females.  Women are whole beings.  What brings meaning to my life may not be the same for you; and vice versa.  Let's speak with the language of acceptance and love.  Let's support rather than judge.  Let's encourage and respect women--all women--whatever paths they are journeying.  I'm a mom with 30 years "mothering" perspective; I bring a unique thread to this discussion. My inspiration: my daughter; Author Madelyn Cain who grappled with this topic at the dawn of the 21st century (2001) when her daughter was a teenager; Author Elizabeth Gilbert who referred to herself as a Criminal Jerk because she didn't want what she was "supposed" to want (marriage & babies); and an exceptional sociology professor, Dr. Patricia O'Brien.  I hope what I bring forth will enlighten, encourage, and enliven the discussions about the authenticity of the female experience.   

My 1st Article at www.RoleReboot.org

I'm proud to announce that I've published my 1st article at www.RoleReboot.org - "Motherhood is not for Every Woman."  I don't advocate for or against motherhood; simply respect for each female to choose her own path without others telling her what her life "should" look like.  I love my kids, but that's my journey, and I don't assume every female wants it (or is able to achieve it).  RoleReboot is a cultural website that questions outdated assumptions about women's and men's roles; to embrace the changing realities and support each other...They are "more than a magazine, they are a movement."  

The conversation is out there

Co-hosts of The View discussed women and motherhood; and Barbara Walters professed her support for her own daughter who says she does not want to have children.  The word "assume" was used several times in the discussion.  The YouTube was available when I posted this in Nov 2013; as of June 2014, the YouTube has become "private"...sorry....but it appears another conversation on this topic has vanished (a common theme).  My book (to be published in 2014) will amplify the discussion.  Stay tuned...

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hCKn-mMBZlg